I've been busy finishing the packing. Tuesday saw the last of the books getting put in boxes and suddenly I felt quite overwhelmed. I can say with honesty that it is one of the few times (but probably the strongest) that I have felt like having a drink to dull out the pain since March. Quite different from wishing at a meal when a'body else is having a glass of wine that I could ("It would be nice"). No, this was wanting to blot out and go back into anaesthesia. I held it back by forcibly reminding myself that I only had to hold out until 8pm, then I'd be at the meeting and get some support.
Why mention this? Is it Pride? Wanting a pat on the back for not doing something stupid? No, gratitude. Gratitude that I wasn't tempted beyond my endurance. Gratitude that God has given me people to turn to and share with. Gratitude that God is there in the midst of all this and will hold my hand (and yes, I am being anthropomorphic!) if I reach out.
Going back on Wednesday to deal with clothing took longer than I'd expected because again the old HP (Higher Power) sent me some support. Two peeps who were in the hall and who I had coffee and conversation with. And there are some conversations you have that are simply blessings in human form. You simply feel affirmed and loved and.. blessed at the end of them. So it's thanks be to God for all grace and especially for ancient one eyed angels in bunnets!